Knowing When to Say When AKA Attempting a Platinum Trophy in Mirror's Edge

I’ll open this one by saying that I’m not an Achievement Whore or a Trophy Hunter, and while many people have argued that achievements and trophies have taken some of the “fun” out of games, I believe that they provide a good yard stick as to decide when you’ve finished with a title (especially with games that don’t really have an ending like Hexic or Peggle). The point is they give me something extra to work for, and if I enjoyed a game, thanks to trophies, I now have an excuse to go back through it on another difficulty setting or with a walkthrough to find all of those random collectables I missed. If I don’t enjoy a game, then I don’t need to go back through for trophies right…right?

That is until I discovered the horrifying exception to the rule, Mirror’s Edge.

I played through Mirror’s Edge for the first time three or four months ago. The game isn’t long (I beat it in two sittings) and like many other games I own, I put it aside, planning to return to it for trophies later on so that it would seem more fresh when I got back to it. But sadly, even then I had a sinking suspicion in my stomach that going back to it wouldn’t be the triumphant arrival I had hoped for.
While the game isn’t terrible, it’s definitely frustrating, and I learned this almost immediately after starting it up. In true strategic fashion, I decided to go for one of the more involving trophies on my first play through, Test of Faith, complete the game without shooting an enemy. The game is about running, not combat, how hard could it be?

The answer for 95% of the game? A breeze, no big deal at all. That other 5%? A nightmare. Off the top of my head I can think of at least three places where it is almost necessary to clear the room of enemies…enemies with guns. And while you can disarm them (which is what I ended up doing), the mechanic for doing so is very fickle. I spent more than an hour in the second to last room in the game alone, trying to get through it over and over and over again without shooting anyone. I did it, but I was dead on the inside afterwards.

After a couple of month hiatus, I decided to pick it up again to try and finish what I started. Again, reverting back to strategy, I decided to tackle some of the more involved trophies at the start, Pro Runner (beat the game on hard) and Packrat (find all of the hidden bags). And like before, I was able to beat the game in two sittings.

“Cool,” I said, “maybe my time off has made me a better gamer, getting this platinum won’t be hard at all.”

Wrong wrong wrong WRONG WRONG WRONG!

After getting these story mode trophies, you’re subjected to the speed runs and time trials, but don’t be fooled by their name, they are hell on a disc, and in a lot of ways, the full realization of the phrase “practice makes perfect.” It seems simple enough on paper, run through the checkpoints and beat the target time, but if you make even the tiniest mistake, you’re done. You dangled on that ledge for an extra second? Back to start. You climbed over that fence and didn’t vault over it? Back to start. I don’t know if I ever played a game before that had so little of a margin for error.

And where does that put me? I gave up with about 55% of the trophies and after a twenty hour barrage of profanities. However, not all is lost, I’ve developed a theory. Certain people are born to play certain games. The only proof I have of this is if you head over to youtube and type in “Mirror’s Edge Time Trials” your jaw will hit the floor.

I guess this one just wasn’t my virtual destiny, and the best part is, I’ll never have to play it again.

~S